Welcome To Motherhood!

So this is it. I've managed to make it through all of pregnancy and almost 6 months of motherhood. Yipee! More often than not it was very difficult, but so far so good!

Pregnancy was full of little bumps in the road. Morning sickness, which I've found to last all freaking day. Sleeping terribly. (Nobody warns you that you will be exhausted all of the time but basically have the inability to sleep.) Peeing constantly, and by that I mean sometimes you should just grab the laptop and hang out on the toilet because you will pee almost faster than your body can produce urine. Swelling really bad. I had cankles that went up to my thighs! I even got a horrified, "Oh SHIT!" out of a seasoned OB nurse practitioner when I showed her my supposed ankles. I had to upgrade my shoes from an 8 1/2 to a ginormous 11!

As an added bonus, I totalled my car at 18 weeks pregnant. I was driving home from work when a woman, rushing to get her son to preschool, ran the stop sign and plowed into the driver's side of my car. Airbags deployed, the full she-bang. I ended up in someone's bush across the street from where I started. Did I mention that I didn't have a stop sign? It was scary as hell. My glasses flew off on impact so I had to ask a bystander to dig around in my smoking car for both my glasses and my cell phone to call my hubby.

He couldn't have made it there faster if he flew. I was bawling, and for anyone who knows me, I could be a boy for all I cry. I'm usually a pretty tough chick. After giving the police report, we made a fun trip the the IU Hospital ER. I was in full blown panic mode. It was pure torture to let them take care of the chemical burns on my hand from the airbag without knowing that the baby was ok. After the longest time, we finally went up to OBICU to get the little one checked out. They whisked me away for an ultrasound.... and the baby was fine. We even got to find out that we were having a little girl! It was nice to get some happy news after such a crummy day. The baby was great, and I escaped with some chemical burns to my hand and some wicked bruising from the seat belt. Hallelujah!

Hubby, baby, and I made it through 40 weeks of cravings, mood swings, and puking. Her due date was April 4, 2010. As it got closer, we decided to induce on her due date. I couldn't handle any more of the terrible swelling and hard time working while enormously pregnant. My last night of work was April 2nd, I got off at 7:30 am on the 3rd. That night, we walked 2 miles on the Canal to get things moving, but no luck. We went in Easter Sunday at 8:30 am to start the induction.

They checked me and realized that I was 50% effaced and not dialed at all. They decided to try a dose of Survadil to help soften the cervix. Once placed (like a tampon) it would stay for 12 hours and they would recheck after. I got that placed and two of our friends came to visit. The nurses told me I could walk around for an hour or so, so we got adventurous and walked over to Riley to get McDonald's. That may have been pushing it a little, but my nurse pretended not to see the Mickey D's cup in my hand as we strolled back in!

The Survadil was ready to come out at 10 pm, then they rechecked. Barely anything. They decided to place another one and check again in the morning. It came out on its own about 4 in the morning. They checked again (oh god that hurt, the medicine makes you REALLY sensitive!) and found I was dialated to 2. They decided to try a cervical dialation ball, which has a balloon that inflates and is weighted on the other end. The weight on the outside gradually dialates the cervix. That was really uncomfortable, but I was determined to be tough. Finally, the stupid thing fell out about noon. They determined that I was then dialated enough to start Pitocin. Woo hoo!

I should've asked for my epidural right then and there but I pride myself on being a pretty tough chick. I finally did break down and asked for drugs to stave off the epidural. They gave me Nubain. Oh. My. God. I was higher than a kite. I fell asleep in the middle of several conversations and would pop up several minutes later and pick up where I left off.

Dose 2 was not anything like the first. It worked for oh, 5 minutes. By then I had lost my illusions of being tough and was begging for the epidural. I have never known relief like when it kicked in. Wow. I even slept through parts of the process thanks to the leftover Nubain.

They told me just to relax and let them know when I felt pressure. We all hung out and chatted until I casually stated that I felt pressure. They came in and checked and IT WAS TIME! 20 minutes of pushing later (complete with jokes while resting from all of the pushing) Miss Iss made her appearance.

I had always heard how powerful that moment was when you see your child for the first time, but I still had no idea how much you fall head over heels in one glance. I would do anything in the world for this little person that kicked my bladder for 40 weeks, made me gain several pounds in my ass, and I had only known for one second. I really feel like all love up until that point was just practice for this moment.

We stayed in 4 days and went home to panicked moments of, "What in the hell do we do now?" There's a huge difference in learning how to take care of your first baby with trained professionals helping. It is entirely another to have to do it all yourself with (what feels like) zero knowledge or common sense. We made it though. I have worried my way through night feedings, colic, severe reflux, doctors appointments.... Basically I have stressed myself out worrying about every possibility, every illness and injury possible. That's what happens when a healthcare worker procreates!

Miss Iss is now a beautiful 7 months old. She is a happy and funny girl. She's determined to do everything at warp speed, like her daddy. She's been saying hi for ages, her vocab now includes dada, mama, and (her favorite!) wow wow. That's what she calls her best friend, the dog. She barely notices us when we get her up in the morning, she's too busy looking for her wow wow!

I am so completely blessed that some days it literally takes my breath away. I can't believe that I am so lucky to have such an amazing family. It really does blow my mind. She's all over the place, I'm lucky if I have a moment where she's not scoping out the house or terrorizing the dog. Having such a high energy little one does not help much in the tiredness department but having her makes my soul sing. I am the luckiest Mama in the world!

Life has truly changed and I wouldn't have it any other way. Nothing makes a day bright like Miss Iss does!

I'll write more later, it's just so good to finally be caught up. I guess that's what happens when you neglect something for so long! Here's to being a Mommy!